Blogger got a makeover and I like it.
Sometimes I have really strong experiences. I feel something profound and I want to keep the feeling. I want to take my big feeling and put it in a little jar and label it "BIG FEELINGS IN A LITTLE JAR" and whenever I need some sort of profundity, I can pull it out of my jar and remember what I felt. Because it's easy to forget feelings. Because life just seems to flow better when there are big things being felt. A degree is more earnestly sought when you feel the ambition that will get you there. I would imagine that marriage probably seems easier in those moments when you feel crazy in love with someone. Even really painful things help me to abandon any sort of illusion that I've manage to build up around me and see things for what they really are, ultimately helping me move forward.
I write things in a notebook. It's my little jar of labeled emotions, a message in a bottle, if you will. "On this day, I felt this and it was awesome." "On this day, I felt this and it sucked." "On this day, I choked on a flatbread crisp and it was awkward." It's kind of like a journal, but not exactly. I write some weird crap in there.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that these big feelings are outliers. Most days, my emotions extend from my mild happiness that my wake-up alarm is the Lion King theme song to my annoyance when people file their nails in class. There is something about that scratchy sound that drives me up a wall. I'm now losing a sense of where I was going with this....but it's 3:30 in the morning so that can only be expected. Write down profound things? Remember your feelings? Don't eat flatbread crisps?
Something like that.
Honey, I love you and your book of emotional outliers.
ReplyDeleteYou're children are going to love reading about your life :) You've always been so good at keeping a journal.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I am tempted to start collecting little jars... it's such a witty idea!
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